Community Chat – A Place for Weary Flingers

[Brian N]

“It’s not just penalties, it’s a known medical fact that women can’t play football”.

Jimmy Greaves

[Brian N]

Watching Bosch S1 and the serial killer is a window cleaner.Outrageous.

[Brian N]

Haven’t seen him clean any windows yet so can’t make any assessment on his tecnique a la Ridley.

[Desperate Dan]

Likewise Tin Tin is supposed to be a reporter and he never files any copy. Instead he just knocks around with an old sailor. The “test pilot” for the Titanic before its maiden voyage was actually a Captain Haddock.

Anyway I digress. It looks like Gregg and John Toad’s last series together will be aired after all. I for one will not be watching that SMUT!!!

And Gregg was snitching on Toad…

[Brian N]

I’ll have the Cullen Skink followed by a nest of vipers.

[Brian N]

Brief return to nominative determinism see Lancs have a spinner called Ashton Turner.

[Desperate Dan]

But Derbyshire once had an opening batsman (who I once met) called Bowler. There, that destroys the theory completely.

You should be called Paine. That would fit in so many ways.

It’s satire folks.

Apologies.

 

[Brian N]

I thought you said satire was dead?

There was a footballer called Terry Paine who made over 800 appearances for one club(Southampton).Players in those days weren’t paid over 300k a week so when they retired had to put their savings into buying and running a business and I like to think Terry avoided that ‘Running a pub’ trope and bought a window round thus keeping the nom det theory alive.(Blimey you’d get a shorter sentence for murder).

Course there are grey areas .The actor Adam Driver plays Enzo Ferrari in the film Ferrari.You’ve opened a right can of worms here Dan.

[Brian N]

Hey Bunny you would never allow this to happen being such a bon viveur but due to an unfortunate series of events all I’ve had for my tea is a mini pork pie and a snickers bar…

[Desperate Dan]

I  see OC is back @hunnybunny.

[Brian N]

There’s a tennis tournament taking place in Bastad just now.Don’t know if he’s playing but something tells me Sinner might do well there.

[Desperate Dan]

Seems like the 25/26 football season is underway before the 24/25 one has even finished. What a farce.

[Desperate Dan]

I see UC is also back @hunnybunny.

The last series has scarcely finished. What a farce.

[Brian N]

I swear I’m going to go all Vaughny in a minute.

[Desperate Dan]

Hello World.

[Desperate Dan]

“Well done to the Lioness winning the Nonsense Pottery Trophy. Those penalties were borderline embarrassing again. Don’t ever ask for equal pay again. Youse are miles off it”

Words of wisdom from Joey Barton, Moronosaurus, leaving his steaming dung again. OB, get a shovel and a bucket.

[Brian N]

Dinosaur dung a paleontologist’s dream.

Bloody covid for the umpteenth time and this time the symptoms are really bad.I’m swallowing broken glass to ease the pain in my throat and it feels like someone keeps inflating a balloon in my head.

Hot toddy and an analgesic for anyone who can remember who uttered the immortal words:

“My brain hurts!”

[Brian N]

As for Joey Barton he’s always been a knobhead and a lot of his nonsense is aimed at his podcast audience.Probably the same people who watch GB News and mill around outside asylum hotels after a skinful on a Saturday night looking for trouble.Although I bet he wishes he hadn’t called Jeremy Vine a ‘bike nonce’ and ‘defender of pedo’s’.Cost him a cool £ 3/4m.

Just been convicted of wife beating also.Nice guy.

My lawyers have advised me to say that the above comment was directed at Barton not Vine.

[Brian N]

Still enjoying Bosch though I don’t think the actor who plays him is as he goes about with a face like a slapped arse most of the time and I think it’s because they make him listen to so much jazz.S1 wasn’t too bad just the odd snatch of Coltrane or Miles while he was at home but things have escalated in S2 as we now hear it in his car as he discusses how Ornette Coleman jammed with weird and Gillie or whoever it was to his totally disinterested partner.”Don’t you listen to any music from this century?”

To make it worse he also visits a jazz club where some oriental bird was performing improv sax on stage.I didn’t know that was legal.Good story lines though and some great one liners.Referring to a suspect in custody “Let him stew he’ll crack like a plumber’s ass.”

[Brian N]

Has anyone seen a Mr Burn Bag?

Has to be my favourite so far.

[Brian N]

Speaking of not listening to music from this century have you tuned into the Proms yet @hunnybunny or are you still watching old Queen concerts?Beethoven’s 5th on tonight think I’ll give that a whirl.Then out for a skinful and some Ukrainian refugee bashing.Classic Saturday night entertainment.Joey Barton’s all over it.

[Desperate Dan]

Sorry to hear about the Covid @brianN. I’ve only had it once but do get long Covid symptoms that would completely prevent me from cleaning windows. Very bad upper arm and shoulder weakness. A one or two other things you probably don’t want to know about.

[Desperate Dan]

Apparently there’s a Mr Barton in the Lurkers Lounge asking after someone called Brian. He’s got his mate Gregg with him.

[Brian N]

Just like old times me talking to myself.I’ll pick a topic.How about Joey Barton?Women’s football?Joey Barton on women’s football?

He does actually have a point about equal pay and I say this purely on economic grounds not as misogynistic dino poo.There is no doubt that the women’s game is gaining in popularity all the time and the revenue it brings in is also increasing year on year especially when England do well but consider just one financial part of the game that highlights the gap that exists between the men and the women.

Sky and TNT have a 5 year deal to broadcast EPL costing £6.7 billion.

Sky and BBC have a 5 year deal for the women’s equivalent costing £65 million.

That gap is replicated in sponsorship and advertising deals so when the ladies bring home that kind of bacon they should be paid on a par.

[Brian N]

Dan you ruined my monologue.