I’m in shock. Not from Trump (I think that’s actually an impossibility any more). No, Derbyshire have actually won their first County Championship match. This is unprecedented in living memory. It’s not the despair that kills you, it’s the hope…

The cricket season starts today. That will make it rain.

You might not be the only one @catsnbirds. Ask @hunnybunny. She normally has some views on the subject,

The girls are back in town.

My word of the day is KAKISTOCRACY – the government of a state by its most stupid, ignorant, least qualified and unprincipled citizens in power. ‘Nuff said.

Way to go Cory Booker. 25 hours without a bathroom break!

Think she has goat blood, judging by her skipping through rocks and boulders up on the mountains today.

Anyway, time for Miss April, in the aftermath of her operation last year. Poor thing still befuddled by the anaesthetic, sat there for about an hour not knowing what had hit her.

Has she got greyhound blood in her?

She once chased a hare. Well, she’s an optimist, I’ll give you that. It was the biggest field I’ve ever been in and also a very big hare. Hare and Twiggy got smaller and smaller until both became specks in the far distance and vanished. After about ten minutes she came back exhausted and wiser. Tactfully I didn’t ask about the hare.