Got any jokes about pigs? Page 7
  • 401 Comments
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    Hahahahaha good 1 @angryboy I luv tongue twisters it's really crazy wen u say them fast it makes my tongue vibrate I remember I used 2 get national geographic kids magazines dat had tongue twisters and they r a lot of fun 2 say lol
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    Pigs only know these letters of the alphabet: O-I-N-K-E-G-Z
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    LOL good 1 @tas like i said they spell eggs like this: E-G-G-Z and they r so dumb dat wen the pink bird blew a bubble the dumb pigs thought it was an egg yet they fell off the cliff and got crushed i think 1 of the pigs said "Gah, I can't feels my leg!" and 1 pig said "Dude, how idiotic can u b, we have no legs!" and other pig says "Oh, right, ohhhh!" LOL
  • angryboyangryboy
    indeed @penguin, they even failed to realize that eggs don't float and are 'white' not 'clear'!
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    Hehe yea @angryboy i guess they didn't know dat girl birds can fool pigs 2 don't they know dat bubbles r not food :) and dat pink birds and girls can take down pigs 2 woohoo!
  • Dr OmegaDr Omega
    Just posted this on Twitter. Thought you all might like it here:
    https://twitter.com/Doctor_Omega/status/285106899966382080
  • angryboyangryboy
    LOL @dr_omega!!
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    hehe yea LOL @dr-omega
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    Hahaha oh man that's so FUNNY!
  • Harrystar6Harrystar6
    Lol @dr-omega
  • kingpiggy087kingpiggy087
    I think the pig's favorite place to drink is the swinery. =D
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    LOL nice or a Hamtina LOL like cantina LOL
  • angryboyangryboy
    pig- whats that noise
    bird- your phone
    pig-*pulls phone out of pocket* ohh! how do i answer it
    (phone only has two buttons, top button to answer and bottom to decline
    bird-push the top button
    pig-where's that?
    bird- there *points at button*
    pig- ohh! *bangs head on button to answer*
    bird-*facepalm*
    pig-hello? I-needa Bath? no silly! my name is Jeffery....well....i think it is
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    Wow pigs cant even use a phone @angryboy i bet wen they play angry birds they can't launch a bird off a slingshot and get the aim right LOL pigs r dumb. good 1 @angryboy
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    Angry birds gangnam style!
    Flingin' Angry birds style
    Flingin' Angry birds style
    There is an island
    Out there it's pretty deserted
    The only ones who live there
    Are a bunch of pigs and birds
    The pigs are called bad piggies
    And the birds are angry birds
    But there's just one little problem
    The birds have some eggs
    And the pigs constantly steal them
    Then they run away
    And take refuge inside their structures
    They try to eat the eggs
    But the birds always come for them
    And then the pigs
    Never stand a chance
    And the birds bring out their slingshot
    And they say, hoy,
    "This has to stop", hoy,
    "Now give us our eggs back
    Or we'll attack", hoy,
    "So watch your backs", hoy,
    "We'll fight you pig by pig by pig by pig by
    Pig pig pig pig pigpigpigpigpigpigpigpigpigpigpigpigpigpigpigpig"
    Flingin' Angry birds style
    Heeeeeeyyyyyy
    Get back here piggy!
    Heeeeeyyyyyy
    Get back here piggy!

    Hope you liked it! I haven't finished the second part yet.
    BTW every time it says 'hoy' that's the sound of when the pigs die.
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    Lol dats funny not a big fan of the real version of the song but dats funny :) @tas
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    Here's a funny story from this tag wen i got my angry birds mini glass figurine i found it 2 b quite funny:

    The story:

    In the uncharted reaches of a vast southern ocean, the obscure island is teeming with strangest wildlife. Only two dominant species- the birds and the pigs- are thriving under these challenging circumstances. A continuous, unwitting rivalry between these two groups fuels all the action in the region. The unintelligent pigs, driven by their insatiable hunger and poorly developed instinct of self preservation, are unable to pass up any chance of feeding on delicious bird eggs.
  • justadoo444justadoo444
    In the new Space update, a powerup causes pigs to puff up their cheeks and float to the Pig Dipper surface.
    Thanks for the room for us birds to swim!
    ~~~~~~~
    Now if the eggs were hidden underwater, the pigs are dumb enough to eat TNT, but not smart enough to explode at the bottom like a depth charge, asploding the eggs, sending soggy, fresh-cooked turkey for them to eat.
    And as Rovio says, "I GOT MA RUBBER DUCKY!!!!"
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=TCPD3z6iWWE
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    Aaawesome!
  • kingpiggy087kingpiggy087
    The pigs are so dumb that even if they got the eggs, they wouldn't even crack open the shells before cooking them!
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    sooo true @kingpiggy087 soo true nice 1
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    AAAAAHHHHH!!!!! I just had a terrible nightmare about a Fat pig with pig puffer PU headed for Earth!
  • penguinloverpenguinlover
    Wow i do know wat dream i am probably gonna have tonite its not angry birds related LOl it was has something 2 do with this creepy voice and it says "OOPS" it was in class dat freaked me out LOL 2day. @tas i hope id get crushed by a puffer pig
  • justadoo444justadoo444
    @tas I cant read it without laughing about how silly it would be. XXXD
  • BBinMiamiBBinMiami
    So a pig walks into a bar and asks for a milkshake.
    "What kind of milkshake?", the bartender says?
    The pig says "anything without eggs. I hate them!"
    The bartender looks at him with amazement but still gives him an egg-free milkshake.

    The next day, two pigs walk into the bar and ask the bartender for the same drink: an egg-free milkshake. The bartender is thunder-struck and asks "So neither of you guys like eggs???" And the pigs say no, so the bartender gives them the milkshakes.

    On the 3rd day, three pigs walk into the bar and ask for egg-free milkshakes.
    "Okay, I had enough", says the bartender. "Why don't you pigs want any eggs in your milkshakes???"
    "Because we already stole them at night."
    "...I see. excuse me for a moment.
    The bartender goes to the manager and says that the pigs have stolen their eggs at night.
    "Give them the bird." says the manager.
    "Seriously?"
    "Yes! Give them the bird!"
    So the bartender goes back to the bar and says "You know we have a special on sardines today; they're free!"
    "Sounds good. We'll take them home."
    So when the pigs go home and start to eat the sardines, their house gets destroyed by the Mighty Eagle, they lose their lives, plus their eggs get taken away by the manager, who is secretly Red.
    What's the moral of the story?
    If you're a pig, then don't even go to bars.
  • Harrystar6Harrystar6
    Lol @BBinMiami nice one :)
  • kingpiggy087kingpiggy087
    A pig really wanted to fly,
    So he built a machine for the sky.
    But the engine broke down,
    And he crashed to the ground,
    Now he has a double black eye!
  • Harrystar6Harrystar6
    @kingpiggy087 nice job and nice rhyming :)
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    I was playing Utopia 4-30 and I wanted to see what would happen if I used Pig Puffer. So I did, and the pig got so fat, he broke my nook because it was too small for him to fit inside of it..
  • justadoo444justadoo444
    Hmmm... Fairy tale pig-dumb time.
    Tortoise & the Hare? Challenge accepted.
    A slow pig couldn't even beat a strand of hair to a finish line.
  • mvnla2mvnla2
    Well, just looking for @Werewolf69's jokes. Pretty good, but maybe this should all be in the Trivia and Fun Stuff group?
  • AngerManagementAngerManagement
    Did you find them, @mvnla2?
  • mvnla2mvnla2
    @angermanagement @angryboy Yes I did find them. I don't usually read this forum, although maybe I should. But then, maybe the Trivia and Fun Stuff group has taken the place of this forum.
  • AngerManagementAngerManagement
    @mvnla2, maybe so, but there has been barely any activity in that group in the last 3 months, while this place is booming with life... Anyway did you read the one about the old man and the key in the Angry Birds Seniors forum, if you can't find it I can direct you to it, but is hilariousXD
  • mvnla2mvnla2
    @angermanagement -- Yes, I saw it in the seniors forum (hate to admit, but I really am a senior). Went back and reread it yesterday!
  • AngerManagementAngerManagement
    Well, @mvnla2, did it make your sides split?
  • WereWolf69WereWolf69
    A little pig goes to the neighborhood drugstore and tells the clerk, King Pig not poop, so, says the clerk, King Pig's a little constipated today, ok, have him take this pill tonight and let me know tomorrow how it went...The little pig leaves and the next day he's back at the drugstore and the clerk asks him, how's the King today? The little pig replies, King Pig not poop yet, so the clerk goes into his lab and starts preparing a concoction for the King which he hands to the little pig and says, tell King Pig to drink this bottle of medicine tonight right after Supper and by tomorrow all should be fine, the little pig leaves and early the next morning he's back at the drugstore, so the clerk looking dumbfounded asks him, King Pig still having problems?? So the little pig with tears in his eyes replies, Big, Big Poop, no more King!!
  • justadoo444justadoo444
    @WereWolf69 OMGROFLLOL Little Pig talks like a tiki.

    Also, I'd call this end of topic, but should stay as a memorial!
  • WereWolf69WereWolf69
    A pig from the Outback goes to the Big City to visit his Uncle, then after the Uncle picks up his Nephew at the Airport, they drive over to the condo where he lives and, as they're walking into the building the Uncle tells his Nephew to go call the elevator while he gets his mail, so off goes the pig yelling ELEVATOR! ELEVATOR! So the Uncle tells him, No, Not like that, use the button, the Nephew, looking perplexed grabs one of his shirt buttons and whispers elevator, elevator.......
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    LOL @werewolf69!
  • fire bomb birdfire bomb bird
    When the pig pops, it will give you 5 grand
  • BBinMiamiBBinMiami
    One time, a pig died.
    The end.
  • WereWolf69WereWolf69
    This blind pig was going for a stroll with his seeing-eye dog and after walking a few blocks the dog lifts up his leg and pees on the pig, the pig then takes a piece of candy and is about to give it to his dog when a bystander walks over and asks, your dog just peed on you and you're going to reward him with a treat? The pig replies, reward him? No Sir, I'm just trying to find out where his mouth is so I can give him a swift kick on his rear-end!
  • AngerManagementAngerManagement
    Well done, again, @werewolf69:D
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    How can the pig kick the dog if he has no legs?
  • WereWolf69WereWolf69
    @anonymoussomeone, The pig in the joke isn't an AB pig. For that matter, none of the pigs in any of my jokes have a thing to do with AB. The title of this discussion in the Forum is "Got Any Jokes about Pigs?" it doesn't specify AB pigs.

    Now to answer your question, I'll ask you a question, how can the pigs in AB hold a frying pan, if they have no arms?
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    They don't hold it. It's on the ground.
  • fire bomb birdfire bomb bird
    Pig 1: What is flying on the sky ?
    Pig 2: It's a bird ? It's a plane ?
    Pig 1: No, right at the first time
    Pig 2: And it's coming to us !!!!!!!!
  • theanonymoussomeonetheanonymoussomeone
    Pigs: Okay we have the eggs. Now let's hide under these explosives for safety.
  • justadoo444justadoo444
    When did King Pig see a deformed egg?

    When harvesting his Eggplant.
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