Seniors on Angry Birds Nest Page 14
  • 1086 Comments
  • @Kathy no wonder your boss didn't believe you at first! That's unheard of! How did Kitty know what you were looking for? I didn't know cats could pick up objects with their lips. That contact lens story takes the prize!
    @WiiWillie my contact lens story is like yours. I jumped into the deep end of my grandparents swimming pool with my contact lenses on - and opened my eyes under water (I was very young). It took awhile, but I managed to find them both at the bottom of the pool, just about to go into the filter drain. I was so relieved that I didn't have to tell my parents I had lost my contacts!
  • Heehee @bird-addict i have no idea how she knew except she must have sensed that i couldn't see..and when i yelled at her ( which i never never did before) i don't know but yes i swear true story..and then I've lost them like you..in a pool but am to blinds to find..llli can't believe you found them wow!! I know the 'dread'of parents knowing about lost eyewear..lol once when i was young i went swimming in the ocean with my eyeglasses i got swept away by a wave..lucky a stranger pulled me in.but i had lost my glasses..my mother was all sooo mad..not worried that i could have drowned that's when i realized how much eyeglasses cost!! 200® out to sea..how could i be so irresponsible lol!! Funny now..not then..
  • @Kathy @Bird addict. Brings to mind before contacts, I was flying in a Piper Cub with Jim doing spot landings in a small grass airfield. He was dropping bags of flour and then landing near them. He said "watch this" and I stuck my head out the window only to see my glasses floating off toward the ground. Never found them in the grass. Maybe Kathy's cat could find them.LOL
  • Ahhh @wiiwillie memories lol..i wonder if there's a land of lost glasses out there somewhere lol

    Can't even begin to say how many I've lost.and being near blind its not fun..except once when i was young and first got them..i remember walking out of eye doctor and looking down at the ground..very disturbing but my Mom was there so nothing i could say that wouldn't be dismissed as'Ohh Kathleen your never happy' so when i got home..i took a bike ride and proceeded to throw my glasses of my face onto the trail..lol
    Of course i thought better of it on my way home..stopped and found them..i wasn't quite as blind back then..but boy was that a good feeling..lol..not so much now i hold onto them add if my life depended on them..hmm actually it kinda does well the contacts anyway now with reading glasses as well...'omg I'm getting old..crap just realized that I'm typing about seeing eye stuff..next thing..huh? What you say..?
    Past bedtime..nighty night..:(;) sorry for my rambling...
  • GN @Kathy. Just signed up for account ABN to back up my stuff. More tales tomorrow on the contacts and glasses. Watch your cat tonight!
  • @kathy - that tale was amazing ! What a fab cat!
  • A golfing joke cos I really enjoyed my golf today!

    A golfer, now into his golden years, had a lifelong ambition to play the 17th hole at TPC Sawgrass in Ponte Verde, Fla., exactly the way the pros do it.

    The pros drive the ball out over the water onto the small green that is on a small spit of land. It was something the golfer had tried hundreds of times without success. His ball had always fallen short, into the water.

    Because of this, he never used a new ball on this particular hole. He always picked out one that had a cut or a nick, as did many other "average" golfers when negotiating very challenging holes.

    Recently he went to Sawgrass to try again. When he came to the fateful hole, he teed up an old, cut ball as usual, and said a silent prayer.

    However, before he could hit the ball, a powerful voice from above seemed to be booming out from the clouds, saying:

    "Wait! Replace that old ball with a brand new one."

    The golfer complied, with some slight misgivings, despite the fact that this same force seemed to be implying that he was going to finally achieve his lifelong ambition.

    As he stepped up to the tee once more, the voice came down again:

    "Wait. Step back. Take a practice swing."

    So he stepped back and took a practice swing, certain now that this heavenly force was going to make his dream come true.

    The voice boomed out again:

    "Take another practice swing."

    Dutifully, he did. He stopped expectantly and waited ...

    A long silence followed ...

    Then the voice again:

    "Use the old ball."
  • Love it Mumsie just love it!!
  • @Mumsie LOL . I think I have heard that voice before!
  • @78rpm I never assumed this thread would live this long and turn in such great place. I read it often and really enjoy jokes. Thank you @all.
    I just wanted to check are there people who fits in my age group and luckily realized there are many of us.
  • We'll be friends until we are old and senile. Then we'll be new friends!
    Just found out that I’m not young enough to know everything.
  • Hi All,

    Just wondering if anyone on a PC has begun the Star Wars Update? If so, would you tell me how to unlock the Bonus level 10? I read the instructions, but I've already 3 starred all the other levels, so not sure what more I have to do to get it unlock. Anyone else having trouble?

    Thanks for any help,

    Barbbjb
  • @Barbbjb -- There are some comments on the release post; so you are not alone.
  • Thanks mvnia2. If you mean "hints"on how to do it, I thought I'd read all that, but guess my "senior moments" are worse than what I thought. Usually don't have any trouble, but this one I just don't get. Guess I'll go back and try again.

    Thanks for your reply though,

    Barbbb
  • LOL @mumsie42 :D

    I was visiting a friend last night and asked if I could borrow his newspaper...

    He said, "This is the 21st century... We don't waste money on newspapers... Here, use my iPad!"

    I can tell you this... that fly never knew what hit him.
  • OK, @Kimmiecv -- That had me laughing out loud! So how was the iPad afterwards?
  • @Mvnla2 In pieces!! But the lesson was learned!! Erm the hard way :D
  • The old fashioned way is cheaper in the long run!! Hahahaahahahahahaahahaa
  • I just noticed this senior thread.. Without having to go back and reading 14 pages has anyone claimed to be more than 64? I have a birthday coming up soon. Just asking.
  • Happy Birthday @pjdambra, judging from all the posts I've read here (I like to read), I'd dare venture to say that you're a teenager just 2 years older than myself, there's a few players that make us look like newborns. I think the oldest is a woman claiming to be around 91 or so. Therefore, there's no age limit for Angry Birds. Ciao.
  • Welcome @pjdambra, hey, we have 40 yr olds claiming to be seniors, ( we welcome them too.)
    like SadBird said, there is no age limit here! --91, really?
  • Hi @pjdambra as @sadbird said there are many older! Viva la seniors!
  • @sadbird. 91 wow .. I think she needs to send in a screenshot to verify that claim.. Lol..
  • Two blondes were going to Disneyland . They were driving on the Interstate when they saw the sign that said Disneyland LEFT. They started crying and turned around and went home.

  • Bob was sitting on the plane waiting to fly to Detroit, when a guy took the seat beside him. The guy was an emotional wreck, pale, hands shaking, moaning in fear.
    "What's the matter?" Bob asked.
    "I've been transferred to Detroit - I've heard the people are crazy there. They've got lots of shootings, gangs, race riots, drugs, poor public schools, and the highest crime rate in the nation."

    Bob replied, "I've lived in Detroit all my life. It's not as bad as the media says. Find a nice home, go to work, mind your own business, and enroll your kids in a nice private school. It's as safe a place as anywhere in the world."

    The guy relaxed and stopped shaking and said, "Oh, thank you. I've been worried to death. But if you live there and say it's OK, I'll take your word for it. What do you do for a living?"

    "I'm a tail gunner on a Budweiser truck."
  • @Kimmiecv -- That's a good one!
  • Love it Kimmie!
  • Don't mess with seniors, especially when it comes to money
    We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the "seniors' special" was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $1.99. "Sounds good," my wife said. "But I don't want the eggs."

    "Then I'll have to charge you two dollars and forty-nine cents because you're ordering a la carte," the waitress warned her.

    "You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?" My wife asked incredulously. "I'll take the special."

    "How do you want your eggs?"

    "Raw and in the shell," my wife replied. She took the two eggs home.
  • LOL @mumsie42! :D
    Glad you all liked the funnies!! :D
  • @Kathy that blonde joke wasn't aimed at you!! Heehee ;D
  • Thanks @kimmiecv. It all makes sense now. Can a senior Senior bleach there gray hair blonde? Would you? Do you? Don't answer that @Kathy. lol
  • A true story, although may only make sense to UK nesters, due to the personalities involved:
    On a business trip, I arrived at The Queens Hotel, Leeds. Suitcase in room. Walked to the bar, to order a drink and then meet colleagues. As I got to the bar, a gentleman moved out of the way to let me order. I said thank you, of course. It was Alan Armstrong, the actor.
    I found my colleagues, sat down, and a younger, taller, very attractive, and certainly more forceful, work mate, rushed over to him. I can only imagine, that as head of the training department, she wanted to interest him in a training video.
    Some minutes later, Alan Armstrong left the bar.
    She rushed over to us, and said, "That Pete Postlewaithe is a very rude man."
  • Ahem @rat9 Pa i resemble that remark lol:)
  • Very funny @Kimmiecv :) no really very funny:):)
  • Lol @hunnybunny - had she called him Mr Postlethwaite? Was it before Pete Postlethwaite died? I mean ones nearly a scouser ( Warrington - so technically a 'woolly back' ) & the others a Geordie!Love to know more details!
  • Did I tell you that I went to the doctor a fortnight ago and he told me if I want to keep fit I should walk 5 miles a day. I took his advice and have to say that I do feel much better but I'm 70 miles from home!!
  • LOL funny one @mumsie42!! :D Geez that's a far way home!! Hahaahaahaaa
  • @mumsie, that reminds me of that Ellen DeGeneres joke:

    My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.
  • @Mumsie. Pete was alive at the time. How the conversation went will never be known, she certainly was NOT the type to deliberately make a joke at her own expense.
    I can only presume she really upset him, she was an absolutely stunning looking woman, the type most men would sit and stare at all night, regardless of what she called them
    Us mere mortals did have a good laugh though!
  • God has a sense of humor

    A woman received a call that her daughter was sick. She stopped by the
    pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car and found that she had
    locked her keys inside. The woman found an old rusty coat hanger left on the
    ground. She looked at it and said "I don't know how to use this." She bowed
    her head and asked God to send her HELP.

    Within 5 minutes a beat up old motorcycle pulled up. A bearded man who was
    wearing an old biker skull rag. The man got off of his cycle and asked if he
    could help.

    She said: "Yes, my daughter is sick. I've locked my keys in my car. I must
    get home. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?"

    He said "Sure." He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car
    was open.

    She hugged the man and through tears said "Thank You SO Much! You are a very
    nice man."

    The man replied "Lady, I am NOT a nice man. I just got out of PRISON
    yesterday, I was in prison for car theft."

    The woman hugged the man again sobbing, "Oh, thank you God! You even sent me
    a Professional!"

    Is GOD Good or What!? Hahahaahahahahahaahahaa :D
  • @Kimmiecv LOL my wife liked that one too! LOL again
  • Nice one kimmie!
  • :D Glad you all got a laugh on that one too!! LOL
  • Testing
  • *Snicker* Ahem how's the testing going then @rat9??? ROFLMAO :D
This discussion has been closed. Please check the new forum.
← All Discussions
Post in the New Forum!