The Bloated Pig - A Place for Weary Flingers Page 3167
  • Tried to post this yesterday, but got the FATAL ERROR box,
    So please bear with me, it’s 24 hours later, and I can’t be bothered to update it!

    Reporting in, just off the Portuguese coast
    Thirty six hours ago I was screaming “Get me off this boat”
    Actually a rather large Cruise Ship.
    The dress code seemed to be ‘imagine you’re in bed at 3am, there’s an emergency, so what do pull out the laundry bin?’
    The weather was dire (mind you, we were in the Bay of Biscay) and a sudden swell took me off my feet: badly sprained wrist; Mr Bunny helping me dress / undress. He seems happy enough…
    Some dire food, too

    Last night: Gala Night, most people dressed up to the nines
    Weather and sea conditions improved, can actually venture onto the deck
    Sausage sandwich for breakfast, and chose the pay extra curry restaurant tonight Two courses each (crab and lobster for me, chicken and beef for him) absolutely delicious. £15 for two courses
    Things are looking up.

    Haven’t read back, internet expensive (for two phones and two iPads £621 for a fortnight, obviously rejected and just paid for my iPad) and patchy reception at that
    Will report in again, whether you’re interested or not
  • And stole the crown!
  • @desperatedan set that up for @kathy, you thief. Etta James came through then? Are you able to play AB with that wrist?

    Impossible sounds like it's on my level.
  • Ah, the classic sausage sandwich. And, the classic Danny Baker sausage sandwich question. Red sauce, brown sauce, or no sauce at all?
  • For the record, I would always go yellow sauce.
  • Has to be brown. Twiggy's turn to cook the tea tonight @desperatedan? Surf 'n' turf? Not fancying my chances with this one. That little glass shelf in the middle is a pane.

    When I'm done with Seasons Dan I'm coming for you. With Classic, olde glitchy versions and macros roasting on an open fire. At current Seasons progress that should be around the year 2030 Although in line with government trends I reserve the right to roll it back to 2035.

    Some good news for the government today.Life expectancy dropping for men and women...
  • @BrianN I agree, WTF 1-23 shouldn’t have been allowed by the usual standards. I wish it didn’t seem so arbitrary. Good luck in your glitch-hunting.

    Jac what a holiday. Hope your wrist heals fast.
  • Heh heh @ixan57. If you do hand Bob's joke book in don't give it to the British Museum.

    Yes @karen68 totally agree and I do just play them for the fun of it, score incidental.
  • Gene Hunt classic line.
    "More nervous than a very small nun in a penguin shoot"
    14 episodes in.
  • Have you come across that scene where they discover one of the local crime bosses is gay? The genie reels off a boatload of colloquialisms describing gay men. One of the most un p c pieces of television I've ever scene. Glorious.
  • Think Lawrence Fox would fit in well(apart from his accent).
  • Hey Bunnies have you been hobnobbing at the Captain's table yet? You might get some decent nosh. Although I have to say sausage sandwich is the breakfast of champions.
  • Captain Sensible?
    Captain Beefheart?
    Captain James Blunt?
    Captain and Tennille?

    er...that's all
  • Lieutenant Pigeon.

    Which is an anagram of genuine potential. Though not in their case. However they did have a hit called Desperate Dan.
  • Just had a power cut for one hour. In the middle of Life on Mars. Which, oddly, featured a power cut as part of the plot (well it was 1973, remember).
  • Captain James Tiberius Kirk
  • Are you pissed again?
  • Silly question. Anyway @desperatedan you'll enjoy Ashes to Ashes though John Simm is a miss. I think the original plan was for him to continue but he had to pull out due to ill health. Keely Hawes walking around in stockings kind of makes up for it.
    Sound track is a bit up and down but that's the eighties for ya. One minute it's The Clash next Visage,still plenty of classic Bowie, Ferry etc. "Fire up the Quatro!"
  • Well, I just hope you are not an expendable, @hunnybunny.
  • I'm off to bed give Spock my love @hunnybunny.
  • Danger Above update. @4lien was about 50k ahead, now lead cut to 16k. But...running out of opportunities. It's going to be a close call.
    41/45 levels in top 20, 35/45 in top 10. Fortunately don't appear to be any archive versions required to get glichy scores in DA.
  • Onto Ashes to Ashes now. Definite drop off in music quality. Not my favourite Bowie period, for starters. And I don't like clowns.
  • Thought Steve Strange was very convincing in Ashes to Ashes. Then it turned out it was really him.
  • Gap down to 12k behind @4lien in Danger Above.
    Softly, softly, catchee monkey.
  • Drinks on me. If anyone is actually here.
    Reached 91 million in Angry Birds.
    Only @asher has been here before, I think.
    And no, I can't catch him up, even with Classics.
  • Talking to myself...lead cut to 5k...walked through an old copper mine today, it was truly like being on Mars, everything a shade of red...going off for a game of dominoes with "Sir W.G.Ogg".
  • Well the problem is: if you book a cruise on cruise ship especially designed for Brits, it’s full of Brits!
    P&O started life as Pacific and Oriental, should be rechristened as Pissed and Obese.
    You cannot imagine the fatness, the drinking of cider (for him) cocktails (for her) from breakfast til they crawl to bed. Some go ashore to pick up cheap fags
    A bit harsh, that’s only 10%
    Next rant on people in wheel chairs who magically dance, facial tattoos, a guy about 25 stone wearing little more than budgie smugglers at lunch (put me right off my food) and idiots with no sun screen who, for some reason unknown to themselves, turn bright red

    Cadiz tomorrow, then Lisbon (been before, like them both) two days at sea and home
  • Hey @tompuss have you ever come across a tv channel called Talking Pictures? I think it would be right up your strasse as it broadcasts mainly British shows from 60's and 70' Rumpole of the Bailey. On the Sky platform here but I expect its available online in France.
    Some programmes come with a viewer's discretion : This programme may contain prevailing language and attitudes that are no longer appropriate.
    Love Thy Neighbour anyone? Life on Mars?
  • Gosh, human life.
  • I'm enjoying the @hunnybunny dispatches. I'm glad I'm not there though, rather be kicking my way through the autumn leaves in a wet Welsh forest with a happy and soggy doggy.
  • Lead cut to 3500 in DA. But distracted by an ABO Challenge today. That's got to be the craziest AB shot of all time (Flock Favourites 18).
  • Lead 3020.
    I know you are all on the edge of your seats.
    I'm just exhausted.
    Quite happy to discuss something else.
    Like the moron today on Impossible who insisted that It was Autumnwatch and not Springwatch that was broadcast in May. Argued his case long and hard and the penny never dropped.
    Like I say, always good for a laugh.
  • Contest either side of the pond to see who can have the most dysfunctional government.
    Like I say, always good for a laugh.

    (well, you have to)
  • It is a close race for dysfunction, but I think we on the west side of the pond are trying harder to win (?) the contest. Finding it hard to find it humorous any more.
  • Think we're catching on here @catsnbirds. Call me cynical but when Sunak says he's making long term decisions only the fearless dare make what I think he really means is he's making short term decisions based on next year's election only a spineless git would make. I reckon he has a massive team of eager beavers scouting for potential vote winning causes he can get behind. If he brings back Topics I'll vote for him.
  • Hey Tom Cruise you back home yet? Glad to be in Penarth which is totally void of the pissed and the obese. Like Dan have enjoyed your reports and if they ever reboot Wish You Were Here you'd be a top presenter. You may have to tone down the language. How's your wrist btw? Mr Bunny doing all the housework?
  • The bit about people in wheelchairs who magically dance sounded a bit metaphysical. Sadly tv folk employ more eager beavers than Sunak so you may be censored.
  • Gap in DA down to 1549 points.
    This is excruciating.
  • Same moron in Impossible (they stay on all week) claimed that Democrats are red because Trump wears a red tie. I must get a life.
  • It's not fair. NZ have stolen Bazball while England played Wazball.
  • How long has the Rugby World Cup been going on for? Will it finish before the cricket does?
  • Reckon it's time for your next holiday @hunnybunny.
    I was supposed to be off to Cornwall next week but due to flooding and a randy bulldog it's been postponed to next year.
    I explained it all to Twiggy and she was fine with it.
    She did express some surprise at the magnitude of the SNP defeat though.
    Maybe we should get a second hand camper van.
  • Would a campervan be large enough for you, twiggy and a randy bulldog.
  • Clearly not @ixan57 unless the extent of wee Nicola Krankie's dodgy behaviour was on a scale so far not appreciated.
    Anyway, the randy bulldog is nothing to do with me or Twiggy, thank goodness.
  • We are home!
    Just to find some joker beat my top score in Ham Dunk 1-1 by 100,000 points. He must be banned, immediately. Can’t quite remember his name, Brian, something, possibly ends with “N”
  • Can highly recommend Cadiz and Lisbon, both need window cleaners who are not afraid of heights, the old buildings are five / six stories high, so 100,000 feet would be no problem.
    And everyone has a cute dog on a lead. No randy Bull Dogs in sight
  • Ur back then?
  • Possibly begins with N. I think I might apply to play on Impossible. @ixan57 was right, it stands for Numpty.
  • When I do get to Dam Hunk will spend a year trying to beat your score at 1-1.
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