The Bloated Pig - A Place for Weary Flingers Page 2985
  • Well if u like comedy let me share a senior moment. Not working today, was around 11.00am and tho I wasn't hungry thought I'd better have breakfast. Went for a buttery and as soon as I took a bite I remembered I'd had a scone for breakfast. In true Homer fashion I said "Doh" and finished my buttery.
    In my defence I did dial lunch down a notch. Just had a not poodle(©Kathy board industries). Yea, I put it in the microwave and went back in time(©Steve Wright)
  • Lol @BrianN :D Either you have a BrianBoard or I'm really unfamiliar with (where are you from again?) My mind says Derbyshire ¿But idk what's a 'buttery' and what's 'a not poodle" I'm assuming it's not a poodle lol!
    And you Earned the privilege of wearing the Princess Crown the remainder of the page
    *Swaps out the Fez (I get there fez for the last comment on previous page right?) Is just a new rule and i want to be sure i get it right! on Brian's head and places crown in it's place*
  • Yes, that seems right @kathy, but I am worried now about what to do if one is required to wear both crown and fez at same time. Presume crown first, fez on top.
    Re not poodle, does spoonerism help you?
    Oh, and with this flurry of welcome nonsense continuing, we might get to page 3000 about April 10th.
  • @DesperateDan no spoonerism doesn't help me at all, guess I'll Google it!
    And Yes! I thought i was faced with that exact situation when Brian earned the crown! I had to go back a couple pages to see Who was wearing what headgear atm! Hopefully we won't have to face the situation, but if we do, we'll get it sorted, [email protected] would be willing to wear the Fez temporarily, i know he doesn't want the "Hunk of metal" (even though It Is solid Gold) worth millions I would assume, in bird currency I suppose..
  • April 10th huh, not to far off..a few months..
  • @Gumby Waasssuuuppp????
  • Dinger isn't working..
  • Hey @kathy can I swap u. I want the fez back. Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown etc.
    Surprised u don't know what a buttery is considering u invented the orange juicer. It's the thing that powers ur phone. Actually it's something I'd never heard of before I moved up to the NE of Scotland. (BTW u wud love it there they speak ur language, it's called Doric. They say things like"Fitlike ma loon"(How are u young man) "Awa n spear the quiney" (Go and ask the lassie)
    Anyway a buttery is a bread like snack, round and flat bout 5" in diam, savoury, quite salty. Texture can
    b soft and breadlike or hard and flaky(bit like maself)Has become my fav breakfast food. Unless I've forgotten I've had breakfast then it becomes my fav 11.00am snack.
    I'm sure u have these in US maybe they're not called pot noodles(yes, even tho they have silly haircuts I wud never put a poodle in a microwave-they're too big anyway.
    Before I go can I say, is this Trumps greatest masterstroke, or am I just really cynical. I think I figured out politics years ago. You have to decide which of the two candidates is the least lizard faced, lying, cheating, chiselling, twister. Then vote for neither of them.
  • Lol @BrianN. Deal *places fez back on Brians head, and rather humbly place crown on her own head* unearned, but even swap'
    I kinda thought that was what a buttery was, the name kinda guess it away, but you definitely had me on the 'not poodles' hahahaha!!
    I actually like Trump, he's done good so far, but we can't talk politics here against the rules!
  • Without stepping over the line into partisan politics, I have always thought that there ought to be an option to explicitly vote for nobody on the ballot paper, i.e. express dissatisfaction with all candidates. This being a stronger statement than simply not bothering to vote.
  • Psephology is one of my favourite words. The study of polls and voting. Two silent p's, no less. From the Greek for pebble, as pebbles were used in ancient times to cast votes. Now there's an idea...
  • @DesperateDan wouldn't that just be a waste of time, lots of people choose no candidate, they just stay at home and save the trip to the polls? But i understand your point of being a Stronger Statement, but the ballots would just be thrown away ! Although the Dems are making it easier with the mail in option, even dead people and dogs can vote! Is Twiggy politically active? Lol
    Now I'm treading in thin water..
    Don't get me started.. I'll get banned from my Own pub!
    *Cancel all of the above*
  • Oops, we don't want to be draining the swamp in the BP now do we?
    OK, I'll shut up now. Apologies.
    But treading in thin water...Lol, I like that. I may use it sometime if not copyright.
  • Hey u know ur lucks in when ur compiling an eloquent and substantial post for the BP,as I was yesterday. ("flurry of welcome nonsense" How dare u Dan. I thought that comment about biting into a buttery bringing back memories from long ago was positively Proustian.)Although it seems to have stirred a little contention in the ranks. Does anyone remember the video to Franky goes to Hollywood's "When two tribes go to war" That's how all political debates should be settled.
    Anyway, back to the important stuff, I bet ur wondering how I got lucky whilst writing that awesome post? No.Well I 'm gonna tell u anyway. As I was typing(on the Brain board 600-it has a mind of it' s own) I saw an ad pop up for the very TV I'd just bought, from the very same store only £100 cheaper. Turns out they have a price match guarantee that extends 7 days from purchase. So, kerching-hooray for adverts! (Bet u never thought ud see that phrase on the nest.
    Doesn't look like the lucks in for the cricket Dan, Sat morn and they're already talking about a bowl off on Sun evening. (Our American friends might want to talk amongst themselves for a moment) I know they were hoping for crowds to be allowed in today until covid reared it's ugly head. Hindsight's a great thing but to my mind it might have been a gud idea to hold the finals back till next Spring. By then hopefully the world will have a tighter grip on the disease, Edgbaston would be full and u cud have next years comp played as normal with the finals in Sep. Sure there would be logistical and commercial reasons why it couldn't happen, but if they can do it for a tourney as big as the Euros surely they cud do it for a domestic cricket final that's normally done in a day.
    OK Kathy u can wake up now! Hope making comments about cricket isn't against the rules.
  • BTW @kathy,that was quite a feisty response to my Trump quip. Got me thinking. 70lbs you say, mm... (rubs chin). Using my Sherlock Holmes like powers of deduction, I'd say that puts you at about 3"7' in height. Thus proving my theory that all short women are fiery. Now before all u diminutive ladies start stamping ur tiny feet, take Joan of Arc as an example. 4"2' and very fiery. Oh wait, she was burned at the stake, not quite the same thing is it?
    Never mind, at least that great American actress Alicia Keys wrote a song about her. It was called 'Smokin aces'. No it wasn't, cmon sing it with me... 'This girls on fire...
    Older patrons of the BP will remember the film of her life starring that great American singer Marylin Monroe, called' Some like it hot'. I could do this for hours(Please stop, I hear u cry) OK then. Wait, news just in, apparently Joan was around 5"2'.This throws my theory into chaos. Hang on tho, if she was 5"2', then she must have been 4"2' at some point.Maybe when she was 12.Phew,theory saved
    Also Kathy, I want my crown back. I think the power has gone to ur head. Besides, it's Saturday and I feel all princessy.
  • Not feeling princessy today, my face needed ironing this morning. On top of that my 8 y old just whipped me at Mario cart. Not such a good day.
  • Today is a very special day, for a very special BP team member!
    Although I can't hang the banner, here it is

    Happy Birthday @Sunshine !!! :D
    Sorry I'm late , didn't forget, just late..
  • And to be sure there's plenty of cake to go around
  • A single flower for the Birthday girl
  • And plenty of Cristal on ice
    OB keep those buckets full
  • @Sunshine I hope you have a very happy day and may all your birthday wishes come true :D
  • Well @BrianN, we got some cricket in the end. But not my team. Derbyshire never win a thing.
    And cricket in England on an October evening? These are strange times indeed.
  • [email protected] it was cricket but not as we know it. BTW ur County wins a lot more than mine(Durham that is) Tho we are relative newbies to the county championship.
    These are indeed strange times. What next, a football World Cup held in the middle of Winter?
  • Yay, coming off furlough after three and a half months. But there will be a serious reduction in flinging. I'll take it in the circumstances.
  • @brianN, hmm, I think this needs a Factcheck. Durham has won 5 major trophies since 1992 including 3 Championships. Derbyshire has only won 3 trophies in over 100 years and nothing since 1993.
    I think you owe us all a drink although most people won't know what this is all about :-)
  • Sorry I've been preoccupied lately, blame @Gumby I'm watching The Blacklist on Netflix!
    What's all this talk about crickets, The BP has its own resident cricket! Crickets are good luck !!
    He's been here for years..
  • Darn it!! I really wish we could post pictures like we used to!
    And i forgot to post Me and @Sunshine song on her birthday yesterday!
    I miss those days..
  • @kathy a very happy and memorable birthday to you as well!!!!! Enjoy all of your birthday wishes!!! I know they all will come true!
  • Thank you @Sunshine :D
    I still owe you a visit and that Cup of coffee..i haven't forgotten.. Route 2 all the way until..
  • Nighty night my Birdie Friends..
  • Is that right? Birthday wishes due @kathy? We don't ask how many but your jukebox choices (like mine) give you away. Twiggy says woof woof lick. I usually select this one.
  • @catsnbirds @karen68
    I’m not a lover of women’s tennis, but the French Open has been amazing, especially as they have stopped grunting
    Now watching Nadal, going way on past midnight here before it finishes
  • My [email protected],obvs I was aware or Durham successes(we had a golden period under Paul Collingwood's captaincy) Patently unaware of Derbyshire's lack of. Bet u support Derby Co as well. Anyway, drinks all round, will even sweep the floor afterwards. (Wud use a vacuum but they're useless, they just sit there gathering dust)
    Must be strange going back to work after that length of time. Can u still remember where it is.?
  • @hunnybunny Totally agree with you. Saw most of the Swiatek v Haley match, WOW! The grunting drives me batty too.
    Watched Schwartzman v Thiem today. Two players I really like, I took turns cheering for them. They really had some terrific volleys.
  • Thanks @DesperateDan Yeah the Beatles :D my big brothers favorite band, all i listened to growing up, he owns every album Ever made,,! Of course he's my very, very older brother as I'll be 26 tomorrow, the 7th! My taste in music was from generations before me ;)
    And thanks Twiggy :D *slips Twiggy a treat under her bar stool* ;)
  • Hi @Catsnbirds, always a pleasure to see your still lurking about in your booth back there :D
    Hi @HunnyBunny Nice to see you pop in as well!
    I really wish you'd fix your name, my Kathyboard now automatically types HunnyBunnywhoStoppedFlingingAgain!! Fix It!! Please ....
  • ❤️❤️ Happy Birthday to our Princess @kathy! ❤️❤️
  • @kathy Happy Birthday
  • Happy Birthday Princess @kathy!!
  • @hunnybunny @catsnbirds also really enjoying the tennis. Yesterday's match between Thiem & Schwartzman was just awesome. It was almost painful to watch towards the end, they both looked so exhausted. Was rooting for Thiem but I also like Schwartzman.

    @hunnybunny did you watch the whole match, being Rafa? The French Open is his house after all.
  • @kathy Happy Birthday!!!
  • Come on, @hunnybunny, @Karen68 and @catsnbirds! Tell me who will win the men's singles.
  • Kathy's power is out. She says thank you to everybody for the Birthday wishes.
  • Internet back for the moment! I hope!
    Thank you everyone for the Birthday wishes!
    Happy Birthday to me lol, power went out as soon as i got home from work! 5p.m
    Now 10p.m.. but Dave got our generator working, so fridge and t.v working What more could a girl ask for on her Birthday :D
  • Power still out expected to be out all night! Looks like the Princess may have a day off from work tomorrow! Now that's the best Birthday present ever!! A day off from work!
  • @kathy WOOT a day off
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